Confessions Of A Yarn Snob

     As I was at Wal-Mart in the craft section this afternoon I came to a major conclusion.  I, Sharon Steinhoff, am a yarn snob.  I had my suspicions, but as I stood there sweating over the lifeless man made commercial yarns that would melt to my skin in an instant if there were a fire, I could only do one thing. Admit it.
     You see, I've been called many things over the past few years...from a fiber whore-der to fiberlicious, but in the end I'm a plain 'ole yarn snob.  
   Well, you know I bought myself a 4-harness loom, right?  It's been going pretty good so far. I made myself a nice little piece that's sitting on my make-up table using some cotton commercial cone yarn that my friend, Cassie, gave me for the warp, and Icelandic handspun for the weft.  
     My  next project in the Learning to Weave book is placemats.  I decided that since it encompasses me making five of them, it will take quite a bit of yarn.  I'm a bit short on time with spinning for myself at the moment, so I decided to go to Wal-Mart and buy some something that I won't cry over if I mess up.  Also, thinking of placemats on the table that will need to hold up to the testosterone eating machines around here, I had better not put a lot of money into them.  I figured they're only placemats, for crying out loud, and I'm learning, so I can do this.  Hence, my sweating over yarn at Wal-Mart.
     Somewhere over the years I wonder if my priorities have gone astray with regards to buying things, although I'm not quite ready to admit it yet.  I will happily spend $40 on a small amount of handspun art yarn knit by a fellow fiber artist, something that won't make a complete project, but accent it, without qualm.  I will spend at least that much on a dirty smelly fleece, and even $5 an ounce for Muga Silk fibers without batting an eyelash. For me, when it comes to creating yarn, the sky's just about the limit (I do have to put a little limit on it so Hon doesn't freak).
     I will spend a good bit to take a fantastic art yarn spinning class from a friend, but about have a heart attack when I have to spend $ 10.98 for a 6 pack of underpants.  Oh my goodness, that rinky dink steak costs $18.63???  GAK ~ head for the ground beef!  Ohhhhhh, those handmade stitch markers are beautiful.  $20, you say?  Sure!
    I'm getting off track.  Back to the story...  I've bought commercial yarns at high end shops, even though they're pretty lifeless feeling due to the extreme processing, without having too much difficulty, but they've been natural fibers.  You know...cotton, wool, alpaca...  I decided not to buy at a particular yarn shop in our area recently because 1) it would be a whole lot of money for the placements someone will inevitably irrevocably stain, and 2) I'm conflicted about their morals, but that in itself is another story.  Hence, my trip to Wal-Mart.
     As I stood there in the yarn aisle, I first noticed the death grip I had on my cart.  Next I broke out in a sweat.  As my hands were shaking, I reached out and grabbed the biggest skein of *gulp* acrylic yarn I could find for the warp.  Then I quickly grabbed three smaller skeins of *double gulp* matching acrylic yarn from the same company.  I dumped all of them in my cart, took a quick look over my shoulders to see if anyone saw me do it, and then tossed my jacket over them.  I had to get out of there!
     Here I sit, telling you my confession. Is it the fact that the yarn is commercial? No.  I've done that plenty of times.  Is it the fact that it was $5.97 for 744 yards?  Nope. Darn good deal.  What it comes down to is the feel of it.  The fakeness of it. Oh gesh, and to top it off, as I type this, Eldest just saw my yarn purchase and said, "Woah, that's a big thing of wool!" To which I replied, "It's acrylic."  GAK ~ I need to give him some serious fiber education!
    So, there you have it folks.  My trip to Wal-Mart for a good, albeit acrylic, value yarn.  You might think this is a strange confession, but it's just one of a few hangups...like when I told you last week about Young'un losing his baby teeth...and of which he lost another of a few days ago.  I'm sure the yarn I bought will make wonderful placemats...and I've seen many lovely items made from this type of yarn at the fair and around town.  I just have to make sure no one around here uses them for evil, like when they took a few knitted dishcloths camping and put them too close to the fire to dry.  Smiling & Waving, Sharon 

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